Please excuse me while I take a quick break from being ladylike and steal a few moments of your time to vent. I promise to make it quick, if not entirely painless.
Society is going downhill fast. Like really fast. I’ll be the first to admit that I live in a somewhat Christian bubble. I work with, go to church with, volunteer with and spend most of my time with believers. It’s not something that I’ve necessarily tried to do, it’s just where my passions and choices have led me. While I want to find more of a balance, that’s a blog for another time. Even with my life such as it is, I’ve noticed a somewhat alarming downward spiral the past 8 or so years. And sometimes I wonder if guys notice it as much as girls do. Really, I think they have no clue.
Let me explain.
A decade ago, a girl could go to the store and run into a creep every now and then but it was somewhat unusual. I would know because if they did happen to be out there, they would find me. Many of my friends called me creep magnet for good reason. I have so many stories that my closest friends have favorites and ask me to re-tell certain ones for their amusement. I’ve been told many times that I should write a book…and I’ve even had someone joke that they were going to start recording my stories to get rich themselves. Basically, I’m saying all of that to qualify myself as a sort of “expert” who has seen her fair share of bad and who can testify to how much worse it’s gotten. But the sad fact is that now you don’t have to be any sort of expert to be able to see what porn’s done to our world. You just have to be a woman.
It’s to the point where I hate even going to a place as simple as the gas station because it’s the norm to get leers and lustful stares. While it used to happen every once in a while, nowadays, if men are there, it’s a given. Teen guys, middle-aged business men, old dudes: it doesn’t matter. And if it’s not you, then it’s the young girl or mother that pulls up right after you. What kills me is that guys don’t even try to hide it anymore. There’s absolutely no shame. Somewhere along the way, women have become objects and while many thrive on this warped version of attention [and may even feed into it by the way they dress] I’m sick of people saying we bring it on ourselves. Yes, maybe that’s true in some cases, but have you seen me lately? Last time I glanced in a mirror I don’t think I’m “asking for it”. In fact, to be honest, it’s quite the opposite. I was realizing the other day how much I’ve grown to hate attention from men. I could honestly go the rest of my life without one more male [except the guy I’ll marry] ever noticing me.
What I’m saying to all of my brothers out there is this: next time you’re tempted to look at that computer screen and justify it by telling yourself that it’s not affecting anyone (and it IS affecting you even if you don’t realize it) then think about your mother, your sisters, your daughters, your friends. We may be nothing like the women you’re staring at, but I guarantee you we’re all still paying the price for the world’s “innocent” little pastime.