Too early this morning, I found myself sleepily discussing life in general with a friend at a local coffee shop. As we sat talking, she brought up how men “need” to be needed. And I don’t think anyone can deny that. Seeing that I grew up with boys, I seem to think I understand men pretty well. BUT…as I drove to work, I found my mind veering off the path of that simple statement. As is usual with almost every conversation, song, or book I encounter, thoughts and questions started racing around.
As a Christian, the Lord is supposed to be first place in my life and all that I need. As a somewhat independent woman, I’ve found that to be the hardest lesson I’ve had to learn. Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always had to do things my way, by myself and it never mattered one bit if I learned the lesson the hard way… as long as I learned it.
In the one Relationship we are to strive for, He becomes the fulfillment of our every need, want and desire. And if a woman was to get to that place where God became everything to her, where her relationship with Him was more important than anything else in this beautiful and exciting world, even bigger than her deepest dreams, then she has stepped into the most satisfying journey of all.
But what room then, does that leave for her to “need” a man as he so desires and God designed? It seems as if His plan for earthly relationships and His pursuit of our hearts contradict each other. It seems that to “need” something, in the way that we use the word, implies a modern day idol. Where does “I need you” come into play if her sole focus is Christ? She realizes that the very necessity of life is God and all other things in her life are blessings from His hand…the proverbial “icing on the cake”.
Of course, maybe this is something only I would think about because I’ve always resisted “needing” anything or anyone. For so long I thought I could do anything and everything on my own and God had to reveal to me my need….even for Him (which sounds so silly). But as things change and I learn, I’m starting to see that that the more something or someone grows to mean to you, the more you feel you need it. And just as it was scary for me to learn to need even Him could He now be encouraging the healthy need for other things? Does one step follow the other? Just something I’m thinking about.